Back in the Saddle Again

Finally, back to the ranch on Friday after such a long time away. I think I started smiling at Durango and the Beltway and grinned all the way to the ranch. Arriving at the ranch was great, it has been so long and I was so happy to be their. Quickly exiting my truck, throwing on my shoes, I made a beeline for Stretch. I have to check on my other big guy. He really is #1 big guy, really love this old boy. He was eating his morning meal in the pasture next to his favorite girl Vanilla. I climbed through the fence, not over, too out of shape to go over the top. Note to self start exercising, NOW. I walked through the pasture and up to Stretch, he looks good and Vanilla actually did not leave when I arrived. She has been more friendly lately. Wow, two years of getting to know this horse and she finally accepts me, could it be. We will have to wait and see. I bid farewell to my big buddies and head for the other big boy, Moose. A quick stop at my tack room to drop off my stuff and off I go to see Moose. On the way I notice a formidable foe, Salsa is on the loose, can a girl not catch a break? This means I will have to take some detours in order to avoid this sassy little donkey. Oh, I feel like Moose did last week, a man eating donkey laying in wait for me. This donkey has terrorized Ben on several occasions not to mention my self. Ben and I both have had to take full on running leaps into corrals when this pesky beast decides to attack. He is such a naughty donkey, but I still love him, even if he has predator attitude towards humans. After my unplanned detour I have finally reached Moose's corral. I really just have to stand their and look at him, he really is a fine looking horse. I must admit he is a little intimidating, all that size. Wow. Today is the day I learn a valuable lesson. I started out a bit apprehensive, he makes me nervous, I am unsure of him, I do not know his personality and he is nothing like Granite. He is young, he is large or should I say enormous and we have not spent much time getting to know each other. I entered his corral and patted him and chatted for a bit. He was eating and when Moose eats that's all he does, he just eats. I decided to groom him, he was looking a little messy. Off to my tack room I go, couple of minor detours to avoid Salsa, apologizes to the breakfast club, who were anxiously waiting for their special treats, which I did not have, and I have my stuff to take care of Moose's grooming needs. I put on his halter, which in its self is not easy, he stands probably 18 hands tall, luckily he is quite cooperative, to a point. Its the rope halter so you know how many times I have turn that around to figure out which way it goes, yes now only two or three, down from the old thirty or so times. I forgot how to tie the knot so I struggled with that for a minute. I really did not get the halter on tight enough but Moose was over it, he can only stand to wait so long before he wants to finish his meal. His former owner was probably way more savvy than me. I started his grooming, its a tall order brushing down this big guy. Half an hour later he is all brushed, not his tail or mane though, just his body. Eric and Sharil invite me to bring Moose in to the turn out with their horses. We talk about my fears regarding Moose, could I be a good owner to this really great horse, they give me good advise. The thought of not owning Moose makes me really sad and brings tears to my eyes, I think he is right for me but I am apprehensive. Oh dear God, great, yes I want to bring Moose to the turn out, but last week there was the killer llama escapade and I am a little unsure of myself and my ability to control Moose. I well, I would not really restrain him, cause that would be dumb, but control, make him know I am in charge. Well, cannot win any wars if you do not enter the battle, so here I go. I am apprehensive, I hate to admit it but he intimidates me and I know I cannot let this happen, he will sense it and react. I put on his rope and go all the way around the turn out to bring him to the gate. I did not take the short cut because I am intimidated and I guess afraid to cut through City Center in case something goes wrong. I opt for the safer long way around, all though their could be lurking killer llamas, I will have to take my chances. He is a little pushy on the way, he wants to run me over, I think he knows I am nervous and inexperienced. We arrive at the turn out, and I open the gate and let him in, oops,wrong turn out its the other one, I retrieve the big guy and put him in the right one. By this time, Iceman and Sawyer are in the turn out and Cochise is on his way. Sharil and Eric get Moose running and kicking its awesome to see. The other horses, for lack of a better word, have expressions of "Holy Shit" is that a horse? He is so much larger than the group its crazy. He is not much for hanging with the herd and insists on hanging out in the corner, pretending he is thirsty. I think he was shy and wanted to be invited to hang with the herd. Sharil got him moving but only for a little bit. I don't think draft horses are much into running around. He spent most of his time hanging by me at the water trough. After a while I wanted to see if he was hanging with me or hanging at the water trough, so I walked along the fence towards the gate, he quickly followed and when I got to the gate he opened it and left. What the hell, I was shocked, we had not chained the gate, it was closed, but Mr. smarty pants opened it with his nose and left. I was standing their completely amazed, what did he just do. Eric hollered over to me to go get him, hello, Elaine wake up I thought, Moose just left. I walked over with a rope to get him and he left again, ok, I am intimidated, so what do intimidated people do when they don't think they can do something? Eric, Eric, can you help me, its embarrassing, what a wimp I am. Eric, the nice guy that he is walked over to get him. Moose decided to walk away through the mare motel, greeting as he went, Eric caught up with him and brought him back. Lesson One, you will never get anywhere if you allow your fears to over come you. Eric handed me the rope, with some advise about not letting him walk all over me, I indicated I would take him back to his corral and I am not taking the long way either, I need to buck up and take it like a man. Heart pounding, rope in hand I set off. Moose is pushing it he knows I am uncomfortable, he walks a little too fast. Moose does not do this for a more experienced person, he is well behaved, but like all horses you have to show them you are a leader or they will take advantage. A few pointers from Eric and I am heading to City Center, I know I am nervous cause I feel my heart beating, come on I am not new to this, I have been around two years now, get a grip. Eric and Sharil walk back with me and I have Moose under control. I have a short hold on his halter and I am swinging the rope in front of us to stop him from trying to move too quickly. He almost steps on me, oh that would have hurt, but all in all by the time we get to the corral and after a photo session thanks to Eric and Sharil we make to the corral. Sharil had me stop to take a deep breath and find the Zen. I did and I feel much better. I have allowed Mooses size to intimidate me, respect it I should, be intimidate I should not. I spent the rest of the afternoon, in his corral, getting to know this gentle giant. I combed his tail and mane and man did he look good when I was done. I ate lunch with him. He tried several times to eat my sandwich, dude, horses do not eat chicken sandwiches. I gave him some of my apple, he spat it back at me, it was a small gala, he evidently does not like small galas, he went through some weird, Ew, Ew, contortions and reproduced the apple on the ground. I did not give him a whole apple either, not sure what that was about, but he did enjoy the Fiji apple I offered next. It was nice hanging out with him. We had visitors to the party, two mini donkeys and Charlie, they shared what was left of the gala apple and all was well. I cannot think of a better group to have lunch with, light on conversation, cause I was the only one talking and they were all listening, very nice.

It was a great day, Lesson #1 conquered. It will take sometime but as I bid farewell to Moose and the ranch, I know next time it will be easier.

Charlie walked me to the gate, I like Charlie and I think he likes me. We stopped to visit Mama and baby, Mama is a super nice horse. I had no treats for her but she just wanted to hang out and baby was their too, both of them eager for attention. She shooed Charlie off, she is a good mother. Charlie did not care he wandered over to the golf cart and proceeded to rummage through the empty bins and bags for a tasty treat. I hung out with Mama and baby for awhile, Mama was just so sweet, she will make someone a great horse and she is a really good Mama. The baby is pretty cute too. This horse was a horse that was found wandering in the desert, poor thing was so thin when they found her. We had no idea she was pregnant when they found her, but when she simply would not put on weight and kept getting rounder it was clearly this mama was going to have a baby. I am so glad Jill found her and took her in. Its really a miracle how the lost horses of the desert always find their way to Shiloh. Irresponsible owners dump them thinking that because they are horses they can survive in the desert, wow, there are some really dumb, cruel people out their. I bid farewell to Mama and baby and set off for home, as I pass Charlie he does not even look up, he is busy rummaging through the empty cans and bags, what a funny pony, what a great place.

Moose and Me

Its been several weeks since my last adventure update. I have not been to my favorite place on earth for several weeks due to an unforeseen bout with pneumonia, which snuck up on me like a thief.

A few weeks ago a very exciting thing happened at Shiloh, the long awaited draft horse Moose was delivered by his owner who could no longer care for him. Oh yes, imagine my excitement when Jill told me of this big boy. What a wonder he his 18 hands and the most lovely horse. He is not a Granite and no horse will ever replace him in my heart but do I dare dream the Moose will share my heart along side Granite. He is something else, very, very pretty with a long flowing tail that has streaks of gold through it and a puffy little Afro due in the front, with his long and lushes mane. (love those pretty manes and tails to comb). He is sweet and somewhat gentle for his massive size. I had the wonderful treat of grooming him and just getting to know him. Jill and Sally invited me to take him for a walk and to turn him out for a run. I was very happy to accept this task. He bowed his head beautifully to let me put on his halter and off we set. We took a quick right turn out of his corral and another quick right and we were on our way. Another turn to the right and heading for the turn out, when what to our wondering eyes should appear, but a Llama. Inca was sitting in the sand sunning herself, minding her own business. Moose however, has never seen a llama and by the look in his eye he thought it was some prehistoric horse eating creature laying in wait to eat him. What happened next was completely predictable if you are a horse and you think there is a horse eating llama laying in wait to make you his first meal of the day. Yes, all 1,600lbs +/- of giant horse "FREAKED". Having been well trained by Jill, Sally, Dave and various other horse people I did what you have to do when a giant decides he is leaving town, let go. Oh yes I did, I let him go and off he trotted to the water trough just outside the bachelor pad, were he quickly grabbed a drink and began a nice introduction to the horses on the other side of the fence. Guess the llama was no longer a threat or the thought of having a horsie chat with some new friends was more inviting than freaking out about a funny faced llama. Funny how horses one second complete freak out and run around like a chicken and then a few seconds later are just standing their like nothing happened. Moose was probably embarrassed, after he realized he freaked out over a llama and was just playing it casual, as if to say, oh I was just kidding I knew that was llama. Silly boy. I snatched up his rope, let him finish his drink and the introductions to future pasture mates and took him back to his corral, enough for one day. Day one with Moose, llamas are not horse eating monsters. Back to his corral safe and sound, a little treat, some chit chat, a few pets and it was time for me to go. I did not want to go, I could have stayed their all day just standing on the fence looking at this big beautiful sweet face horse. A giant draft, the horse I have always wanted to have standing before me and maybe, just maybe he could be mine.

Jill told me she would evaluate Moose to see if we could be a match. I need a calm horse, one that does not need an enermous amount of training and one that fits for me. Later in the week Jill sent me the email that would make me grin from ear to ear. Yes, she though Moose and I would be compatible. I was so excited I could not sit still and I think I went straight to face book updated my status, sent a couple of text messages and relished in the thought that this amazing horse could be mine.

Its a bitter sweet place, I miss Granite in a huge way and find myself thinking why couldn't I have been able to have him longer, he was so awesome and he meant so much to me. I miss him like crazy, even as I type this now tears stream down my face. I just love that horse more than words can express. Thats the bitter. The sweet, Moose is very cool, very sweet, I just look at him and am amazed, he is a whole different horse from Granite, he is young, he is huge, he is a challenge, he is what I had always thought was beautiful in horses. Those big giants are so amazing and to imagine he could possibly be my horse if all works out, is so exciting and scary. Me and him will have many hurdles, we have passed one, the llama, on to the next.

A little lost

As much as I love to go to Shiloh a part of me feels very sad when I go their. Sad because Granite is not their. This is a sadness that will pass, although I will never forget this wonderful horse it will get easier to go to Shiloh and walk in the pasture. For now, I do not walk in Granite's old pasture. I feel as though something is missing, in me and it changes the way I feel and write about Shiloh, like a hole. I will have to figure out how to deal with this. Almost feels like its meaningless to write this story without Granite. This too shall pass their are many wonderful animals and people at Shiloh, Granite just took up a lot of my thoughts and now I need to move on.

I find my self a little lost at Shiloh, there is plenty to do but for some reason I sort of wander. I find my way to Stretch, he is always happy to see me and welcomes the attention, he follows me like a big pup, he really is a super cool horse. Stretch and Vanilla were the first horses that I fell in love with at Shiloh. Vanilla because she is a beautiful white draft horse and Stretch because he is a gentle giant. How lucky his owner was to have him, he really is amazing. Whenever I am at Shiloh I always find myself drawn to Stretch and I love spending time with him. He returns my grooming of him with gentle nudges. He will follow me all over the pasture, it really is a wonderful feeling to have him follow me as if I was his leader. Now, Vanilla his pasture mate, is not quite so friendly. This week she was a little more friendly than usual, as I was able to get within a foot of her. Silly, Silly horse all the love you are missing out on because you want to play the silly mustang game. Oh well, hopefully by spring she will let me groom her again. I was to a point with Vanilla that she would allow me to brush her down, but for some reason she will no longer allow me to get that close. I have plenty of time and with the help of Stretch perhaps she will allow me to give her a good brushing.

A few weeks ago I got to clean out my first stall, yep, I have never cleaned up a stall and Jill was short a man and asked if I could help. I was very happy to assist. I worked hard and cleaned up a few stalls, first it was Iceman, he is a wild mustang, not so wild anymore, just cautious of people. I entered his stall and we did the dance, you move this way, I move that way. It worked perfectly, he didn't trample me and I did not accidentally through manure at him or accidentally jab him with the rake shovel. The rake shovel is like a rake but its turned up on the end so that you can pick up the manure and toss it out of the stall. Quite ingenious. My next stall housed an Icelandic pony who's name I have forgotten, he also did the dance and all went well. Next it was Carefree and she is just that, no dance here, she ignored me completely as she munched on her lunch. On to Oreo, Oreo is a nice horse and has recently found a new home. She is a beautiful black mustang with some white markings, thus the name Oreo. Oreo is very sweet and I really enjoyed cleaning her stall and making friends with her. Their really is an art to cleaning the stalls. My stall cleaning did not look nearly as nice as the guys, they leave nice rake marks and its really spotless when they are done, mine not so good but I tried. I enjoyed it because while you are working away you can think and sort of chat with the horses. It was good.

Jill is helping me with some horsemanship lessons,my first lesson included running Moses around the round pen, although I am not sure if it wasn't vice a versa. By the time I was done with that I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that I completely out of shape. Ran out of steam a couple of times while trying to get Moses to move. You cannot just stop you have to get it done, so I bucked up and got Moses moving, not before he tried to kick me, but being light on my feet I avoided the attempt. Well not exactly because I was light on my feet, I was just out of reach. I did run him around and he did join up, so that was a great accomplishment. Mosses has been in the pasture awhile eating hay and hanging out so he saw no reason whatsoever to run around a round pen being chased by a lunatic. Next it was the saddle, it is important to put the saddle in the right place, you can hurt the horse and yourself if you do not do this right. By the end of my lesson I felt quite accomplished.

I am ready for my new guy to come through those gates, do you think anyone would mind if I just stood their tapping my feet till he arrives. Guess I cannot do that, I will get in the way, I have a family and a job. I will have to be patient. Till my new horse arrives, whom ever that will be, I will help out around Shiloh, take lessons, hang out with Stretch and try to get closer to Vanilla and occasionally remember the times I had with my very best horse friend Granite.

In the blink of an eye.

It has taken a few weeks for me to think about sitting down and writing this blog. Just thinking about writing it brings tears to my eyes. Perhaps the events of a few weeks ago were a premonition of things to come.

My buddy, my friend, my first horse, he was not taken by aliens, or stolen by horse rustlers, as I had feared, just a few short weeks ago. He was gone in the blink of an eye his spirit left his body and he was gone. Standing in his pasture, I imagine he laid down to rest and never opened his eyes again. The news came to me at around 8:30 a.m., November 18, 2010. Jill called to let me know that they had found my Granite in the pasture, he was gone. I could not comprehend what she was saying to me, it was not until I hung up the phone that the news took hold. My Granite, that wonderful puffy cheeked fellow was gone. It was unexpected and I was not prepared. I do not think we are ever prepared for the passing of our loved ones whether family, friend or animal. They all hurt, the are all unexpected and we all wish we had more time. Although, I wish with all my heart that I had more time with my very first horse that I loved so much, I cannot express how much this horse meant to me and how much it hurts that he is gone, he was a beautiful horse. He opened doors for me that I would never have opened or even considered going through. He taught me patience's and unconditional love. He was the master and I was the student. I will cherish him forever and will be forever grateful for all that he taught me and for all that I taught him. He is gone but will never be forgotten. I think when you love in your life and you loose the loves in your life they make cracks in your heart and each crack in your heart is a medal of honor that you have given your love to someone else and you will be measured by who you have loved and who loves you. One of my favorite quotes says it all, "It is better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all" (Alfred Lord Tennyson). I will take all the cracks in my heart, because each time you love you live a richer life. We are so lucky to love and be loved and having Granite only confirms to me it is all worth it.

Life is like musical chairs, sometimes the music stops and their are no more chairs. For now we have enough chairs and life goes on and the music plays but someday the music will stop and their will be no more chairs and your turn will be over, I need to make sure I play the game to its fullest, love, live, laugh, learn, dance, sing, seek adventure, eat well, smile lots, cry sometimes and cherish every moment of it all. Until the music stops and the chairs are gone.

Granite is gone but my love and desire to own my own horse is not. He taught me many things about owning a horse and I have many things yet to learn. I will probably never learn all their is to learn. But because of him I will be better to the next horse that I am lucky enough to have come into my live.

I know that my new horse will come into my life just like Granite, a surprise, a treasure I will discover, not an obvious fit but something will click and the music will play and we will be buddies. I know Granite will be waiting at the pearly gates for me someday but for now I will watch the gates of Shiloh, through those gates will come my new adventure, my next lesson my new buddy to love. I will continue to learn as much as I can, until the day that horse comes through those gates. I will know, he will be just right. His name will be Carey in honor of the big guy that I loved so much and in honor of Tony Curtis who helped name Granite. Carey Granite. yep, his name will be Carey.

For now I will content myself with enjoying all of the wonderful horses and other creatures at Shiloh. Today I spent time with Oreo, I do not know much about her, just that she was once a wild mustang, she wears the tatoo of the BLM on her neck. I imagine she once roamed freely somewhere in the western United States. I imagine she was rounded up by the BLM and somehow ended up at Shiloh. She is sweet. What I love about mustangs is their very thick necks and somewhat stocky build. Mustangs are truly amazing and beautiful horses, how romantic to think a horse called Oreo once roamed freely with her herd somewhere out west. A living legend in the mare motel at Shiloh. We are honored. I know that this horse was saved by Jill and Sally, from what I do not know. It is certain though, she was saved and her destiny is certain, she will be loved and cared for either by Shiloh or her new owner, all the days of her life, Jill and Sally will make sure of it.

I also spent sometime today with another horse, when this horse first came to Shiloh he made me overwhelmingly sad. He looked sad and thin and he had no life in him. He was hurt in his heart, worn physically and broken in his spirit. Before he came to Shiloh he was destined for slaughter, he was marked for slaughter only, who does that? Who takes away his chance of a happy live, what cruel sick person does that. They were foiled, in a blink of an eye he was saved, saved by angels of Shiloh, Jill and Sally. This now is a beautiful horse, his body,heart and spirit are healing and he proudly parades around the arena when Elisa rides him. He is proud and happy and he is better every day. His faith in the human kind is being restored. A little massage and a rub down today is certain to seal the deal, he loved it and I was happy to give him a little love, he deserves it and I needed to help a horse who really deserves a nice friendly pat on the back and a bunch of carrots. My heart felt good after spending time today with Oreo and Gentry.

I also visited my Shiloh favorites Stretch and Vanilla, all is well with these two happy horses. Stretch was happy to have his neck scratched and eat a few carrots. Vanilla was thrilled to give me the cold shoulder, all the while eying me cautiously from a distance. A quick sniff of my grooming bag and a nod of her head in my direction is all it takes to know she loves me too.

As much as it hurts right now to go to Shiloh and not see Granite, it feels really good to go their and see everyone else. Living, loving, learning, laughing, crying, frolicking, working and all the things we and animals do to live our lives. Shiloh is a good place and I am so thankful I found it.

The Unexpected

Friday, November 5, 2010 I was more than excited to get to Shiloh, it had been two weeks since my last visit due to medical issues that have now been resolved. I packed up all my stuff and literally raced to Shiloh to see the big guy Granite. Well I did not race exactly, I never broke the speed limit or anything crazy, neither did I stop to smell the roses along the way. I was going straight to Shiloh, no day dreaming checking out the scenery for me today, I just wanted to get to the ranch. I arrived at the ranch at exactly 8:30 a.m. I marched straight to Cherry Pie with my bag of goodies. I did stop in on the new baby and Mama, so cute. But nothing could stand in my way I want to see my horse. I prepared his treats and marched over to the pasture to get my big guy. I looked, I looked, I scanned the pasture no Granite. Oh my God I forgot what my horse looks like, I thought. No I am dumb sometimes, but holy crap I would never forget what my horse looks like. I opened the gate, walked in, set my fears aside regarding my lack of memory and marched around the pasture looking at every flea bitten or close to flea bitten gray I could see. About five horses are in the gray/white flea bitten color and none of those horse was my horse. I was thinking I am not this dumb I know what my horse looks like, he was not their. I marched around again, no Granite. How can this be? The pasture is made up of a large open area full of about 30 or so horses, maybe, and in the back a whole bunch of mesquite trees. Low lying bushes really with sharp thorns. The horses love to go in their at night to sleep. How they get around in their I have no idea, but they do. All the horses were in the pasture area eating, but not Granite. A terrible thought came into my head, Granite would not miss a meal he is either sick, dead, or gone, that is the only way he would not be out here eating with the other horses. Fear, pure fear entered my soul as I walked towards the mesquite trees, I had no idea what I would find. I wandered through the trees, no Granite. Panic, yes panic was coming over me. I had to stop myself, do not be silly he is fine maybe he is in the pasture next door. Yes, that's it some how he got into the other pasture by accident. I ran around to the other pasture, now mind you these pastures are not small and the dirt is sandy and can give you some serious exercise walking around in them. I climbed through the fence to other pasture, looked around, no Granite. Back to the other pasture, again I marched up to every horse even close to Granite's color. Stared at them, eyed them up and down, they probably thought I was crazy. Lady, I am a mare, he is a gelding, can you not tell the difference? Hey I was in a panic, doubting every part of my brain, it must be me, am crazy, I cannot recognize my own horse. He was not in that pasture, I am not crazy, dumb or whatever else you would call it when you cannot pick out your own horse among thirty other horses that do not even look like him. I left the pasture and wandered over to Eric who was working with his horse. I explained to Eric my dilemma, he said the horses in the Bachelor Pad had escaped on Tuesday and maybe the guys in rounding them up put Granite in the wrong pasture. Reasonable explanation for my missing horse, yes. I thanked Eric and marched off to the other large pasture at the other end of the ranch. No, Granite, all the horses in their are brown or black with only a couple of white horses. Oh no, where could he be I thought. I checked every stall, the blind horses corral, the gummy coral, all of them and no Granite. Mare motel, the inside stalls, everywhere even the quarantined stalls, no Granite. I marched back to the other end of the ranch, on my seek and find mission and marched all through the back of the ranch and all those mesquite trees thinking maybe they missed him in the roundup and he was back their. No Granite, by now I was holding down the rising panic, with tears ready to spill any moment, I approached Eric again, with a brave face on, I explained he is nowhere Eric I cannot find him. He walked back over to Granites pasture with me and we both searched the pasture and mesquite trees again and the other pasture too. No Granite. I agreed to check the other areas one more time and Eric went back to get his horse. I have never doubted my ability to find Granite in his pasture, for god sake he is big whitish gray with a huge scar and big puffy cheeks, where is he? By now I was losing it the love of my life the only horse I have ever owned has been stolen or worse he is dead or hurt and I cannot find him. I took my rope and halter back to the tack room and stood in the middle of Shiloh in tears, not wailing, just silently crying a little, being brave, all the time doubting my ability to locate my own horse and fearing the worst. Did someone steal him? Did aliens abduct him? What is going on, I really did consider alien abduction, just for moment. I gathered my wits about me and I asked the ranch hands to help me, Felipe sent Leo over to find Granite. Please, Please, Please find him Leo I thought. Sure enough five minutes later Leo drives over in the little golf cart and points to Granites pasture and motions he is over their. What? are you seriously kidding me. I think Leo thought I was crazy, silly girl cannot find her own horse standing in the middle of the pasture. Leo, I swear he was not their. It is now 11:30, I have been looking for Granite for three hours and Leo found him in less than five minutes, oh come on. As thankful as I was, I was sure Leo had him in his pocket the whole time and just pulled him out and dropped in the middle of the pasture. As absurd as that is I could believe that before I could believe I searched that pasture three times and did not see him, oh and do not forget Eric helped me too. Eric, had a disclaimer though, he was not sure what Granite looked like so maybe he could have missed him. So I am the dummy that cant find their own horse. Please, tell me I am not the big of a dork. I ran over and sure enough their he was right in the middle of the pasture under the shelter. I can assure you he was not their earlier. I walked up to him and he turned around and walked away from me, I was devastated, what is wrong with my big guy. I finally caught up to him but he was not happy, he was sad, I knew something was wrong. I told him I would be right back and I ran to my tack room to get the halter and rope. When I got back to the pasture, he was gone. Yes, gone. I looked all over, oh gee z this is ridiculous, really I cannot spot my own horse, please am I losing my freaking mind. He was no where, no where to be found. I checked the five white horses, who by now considered me some strange stalker and moved away from me when I approached. Crazy lady. Where did he go? Then out of the corner of my eye, in the mesquite trees I see a leg, slight movement, yes a leg. I marched into the trees and sure enough their he was, standing very still in the middle of all those trees. He must have been right their the whole time I was searching for him, I simply could not see him. Why was Granite back here and not eating in the pasture? He loves to eat, he does not miss a meal, but yet here he is no eating just standing. I walked up to him looked into his eyes, what is wrong buddy? Come on, I know I have been gone and your best friend Stitch is gone but really are you mad at me. Oh no, my poor guy. I put on his halter and tried to lead him out, he was not coming easily, I had to pull him along. We finally reached the gate with a little coaxing we left the pasture. I turned around to shut the gate and what did I see? A large baseball lump on Granites side, OH NO, that is why you are acting strange, you are hurt. I knew with everything in my soul that he was not right and sure enough he was hurt. I was upset, I had no idea what it was, it looked like a hematoma and I had no idea what to do for him. I walked him over to Felipe and he told me to put him in the mare motel and Jill would look at him when she returned on Tuesday. I stopped to show Eric, he had not seen anything like it. Oh my God my horse has a huge bump and no one knows what it is. Felipe was not worried about it though and he said he would keep an eye on him so I had faith in Felipe, he knows horses. I put Granite in the stall and went to get his treat. I came back and presented to him his favorite thing food, he would not eat. Oh no, what he will not eat. Now I am worried. I sat with him for the rest of the day, petting him, combing his mane, brushing him down just being with him. He just stood their. Sad, distant, not alert, pretty unhappy. I was very sad to go home that day I had no idea what was wrong with him whether he would be ok. I questioned my self, I am so inexperienced, I have very little knowledge, am I the best owner for him? Would he be better off if I was not his owner and someone who knew more about horses was his owner, or if I had not adopted him and Shiloh had kept him. You know what conclusion I came too. Even though I am learning and I surely have a lot more to learn, he is better off being with me. I love him, I have his back and I will never let him down. I will make sure he gets better, I may not know whats wrong, but I will find out and I will make sure he gets whatever he needs. I searched my soul for the answer, is he better off with me or without me? I know in my heart,my head and my soul that he is definitely better off with me. That is a good feeling, knowing that even though you do not know everything and you may make some mistakes, this horse is better off with me than without me. That makes me smile. I drove home still apprehensive about his condition, but knowing that he would be OK and that I would make sure of it. Sometimes loving someone or something is enough you do not have to know how to fix it, you just have to promise to do whatever it takes to help them and for that reason, the big guy is best with me.

I knew in my heart he would be OK, he did not have a life threatening problem, my tinge of fear came with the problem of the not eating, that worried me. He could, in addition to the hematoma have colic, but Felipe is watching him and I trust him.

The next day I jumped out of bed so fast I got dizzy and had to sit on the bed for awhile. I think I got a little dehydrated in my three hour search of the ranch the day before. Who know that ranch was so big. Finally, got dressed and bid my Ben farewell and headed straight for the ranch. The whole time I am driving I am thinking about Granite. The day before I had called Dee, in my panicked search for Granite I had called Dee to get Dave to see if he knew anything about the whereabouts of my horese. Dee was so helpful and so was Dave. Dave agreed to meet me out their today and look the big guy over. Because I was so concerned about Granite, mulling over and over in my mind what could have happened to him, I missed the Jean exit. Are you seriously kidding me, in almost two years of going to the ranch I have never missed the exit, but today of all days, I missed the exit. I had to drive all the way to stateline to turn around, 22 additional miles and minutes delayed in getting to the ranch. I fianlly turned down the garvel road to the ranch and who pulls up behind me but one of the ranch hands with the horse trailer. Flash, oh my God they took Granite to the vet, oh no. I parked my car, jumped out, hurriedly put on my boots and ran into the ranch. Granite was in his stall, oh my God I really have to stop panicking, right. Come on. Dave and I looked over my guy and he had been eating and pooping. Eating and Pooping is a good sign, horses have to eat and they have to poop or oh no trouble is on its way. The pooping is very important. Write that down in your book, horses have to poop. Dave looked him over, yeah, looks like a kick, a bee sting, alergic reaction. Oh and Dave pointed out his feet are swollen. Oh my god, wil this never stop? Off I went to water down his feet and run water on his bump. Upset yes, but not doubting that my Granite was better off with me. Yes, I would take care of him. He was eating his spirit was back and I spent the entire day with him. I sat with him in his stall I played with him in the turn out and he was getting better. He was eating, he was pooping, he still had the bump and now swollen legs, but his spirit was back.

The best part of all of this was when I had his hoofs looked at by the farrier who happened to be their Saturday. I asked him if he would look at Granites feet, it was time for them to be trimmed. One problem,Granite does not let you pickup his back feet, he will cow kick you and he means to hurt you. In times past they had to sedate him just to get him to let them trim them up. This Saturday was different, I explained to Travis Granites issues, he said lets give it a try. I stood and held Granite and spoke softly to him I looked him in the eyes and I told him to trust me. Buddy I got your back, it took awhile but I could tell when I gently stroked his face and looked into this big brown eyes, he trusted me and Travis trimmed his feet with no sedation. It was scary a couple of times but Granite gave me his trust and I took care of him.

Sunday I sort of con'd Ben into going out for just a minute, well three hours or so, I worked my big guy, around the turn out, he learned Parelli and we cleaned his feet again and it was a great day. I felt good about being a horse owner. Dave and Dakota spent a lot of time with me on Sunday and they helped me a lot to understand how to train my horse. This big former stallion has had little or no training and he has a major stubborn streak, but we made progress.

He will be OK, Jill came home and she checked him, he did get kicked and the hematoma will go away, the swelling in his legs is common in this type of injury, even though he was kicked in the upper shoulder area. I learned a lot this weekend but most of all I learned, I really love that horse, which I already knew, and most important he is better with me than without me. I got your back big guy no worries their.

Sometimes you do not have to be an expert to know something is wrong with your horse. I knew the minute I could not find Granite that something was wrong. We have a connection, I can see it in his eyes, his big beautiful eyes tell the whole story. I learned more about him this weekend than I have in six months and I know this, he loves me, in his horse way, I am his leader and he will follow me, he knows that I have his back.

I did not expect to go through all this when I started out that Friday morning, but I came out of it a better horse owner and with a horse that truly trusts me to make sure that he will be taken care of. I am his leader and we are a herd him and me.

Life

Written on September 27.

Spending time at Shiloh helps me find peace in my life.
As we all know, life has many ups and downs. Sometimes it gets hard. Whenever I feel as though things are not just right or I have to many burdens to bear, I think of Shiloh: the horses, the volunteers and Jill and Sally. It helps me to put my life into perspective.

Both Granite and Shiloh offer me peace—a sense of belonging and purpose.

A few weeks ago, I was driving out to Shiloh and a creature crossed my path that I have never had the honor of seeing up close before. It was the most beautiful coyote, streaking across the road in front of me. Now, I know ranchers and farmers may not think of these desert creatures as beautiful, but this city girl? Well, she stands amazed at the beauty of the wily coyote. They live in the hot desert, with little water where food is scarce. They are smart, sly and full of spirit and ingenuity. The coyote that crossed my path was a specimen of good health; his coat was shiny and made up of beautiful colors. He had started across the road at a slow gait and I had come upon him as I turned at a bend in the road. His form was amazing! He went from a lazy kind of gait to a rocket ship in a blink. I swear I saw the G forces as he screamed across the road. It was a sight to see.

This day was one of my sadder days at Shiloh. One of my favorite horses, Stretch, was not looking good, so I spent a lot of time with him that day carrying water to him and trying to feed him extra treats, though he would not eat. I wasn't sure when I left that day if I would see him again. Felipe gave him some medicine to help his tummy and, as I left, I prayed I would see him again. I walked out of Shiloh that day with tears in my eyes and a heavy heart.

I always check the daily Shiloh blog that Jill posts and no bad news of Stretch was posted in the following days. That next Friday, I came out to Shiloh and rushed over to the pasture where Stretch roams and searched each and every horse looking for him. My heart was in my throat, but there he was, far off in the distance. My prayers had been answered and he looked much better. Jill told me that sometimes a change in the weather, combined with the fact he is old can really get animals down. Luckily, my big guy was looking much better. I hugged on him and loved him before I went to see Granite.

This week I stopped by Stretch's pasture, where he was standing straight and tall munching away on his breakfast. Life is good. I called him and motioned to him and, like he always does, he came straight away. I gave him major hugs and kisses, and it looks like he is going to be ok. That, my friends, brings a smile to my heart. Ms. Vanilla is also doing fine with her little aloof self. I only get a casual glance from this girl, but hey at least she notices me. Maybe someday I will win her trust, but for now I am content to admire her from a distance.

Then I head off to see my big guy, Granite, and man he is awesome. Before going to get Granite I always head to Cherry Pie (little shed/house on the property) because this is where I prepare Granite's weekly treat. I chop up his apples and carrots so I can mix them with his Equine Senior, which he LOVES. I usually put corn in the mix, but they did not have any that morning. Have you ever licked a bowl of ice cream? I have...when your home by yourself eating ice cream (shh, I should not really eat ice cream) and when it's all gone, you just lick the bowl. Well Granite loves corn, and when I mix up his treat with the apples, carrots, corn and Equine Senior he actually licks the bowl clean. It is the funniest thing, that big old tongue licking every curve of the bowl. I have never seen a horse lick a bowl before now.
After preparing his treat and setting up all my stuff for his majesty's grooming session, off I go to Granite's pasture to get him. Its truly a ritual each time I go to Shiloh to check on Stretch, get Granite's treat ready and set up all his stuff for his grooming session. Anyway, off I go to get him. I always have to search the pasture as he seems to be at the farthest end. And, of course, he is always with Stitch. Stitch and Granite are the best of friends. Granite leads the way to Stitch's constant nudges as to which direction they are to go. Its the funniest thing. I think Stitch is really the leader but he lets Granite go first and he supervises.
Granite loves the big pasture and he loves to eat his hay. I can barely get his attention as munches away at his morning hay. I open the gate and wander across the pasture, greeting many a happy horse along the way. They are like kids in a playground when a new kid comes along. They walk up to you to greet you get a little pet and then once they know who you are off they go again to eat their breakfast or hang out. Granite is so sweet. He stands very still while I go through my ritual of trying to figure out which way the halter goes. Will I, seriously, ever learn how to put that thing on straight away without having to talk to myself about which way it goes?
"Oh yes. head here, over the head, down this way... tie here."
Stitch doesn't like it much when I steal his friend. But come on Stitch, I only get him once a week for a few hours. Stitch likes to give me a little bit of a bad time, but I have him figured out, he loves Granite and wants to hang with him because when Granite's gone he doesn't have anyone to supervise.
He's a cutie and I give him a little hug, sometimes a treat, and he lets me take my boy. He does follow me all the way to the gate to make sure we get there ok and then we bid him farewell. I swear he waits by the gate until we come back, because he is always there waiting for us.



Granite and I play in the corral and I try to remember what I have read, learned and watched on the Parrelli tapes about the seven games. The seven games help you train your horse and develop a bond of trust. I think I confuse Granite more than I teach him. Sometimes he looks at me like, "What are you doing?" I think if he could, he would take my carrot stick and show me how it's really done. But, you know, that's what so good about having an older horse. They know the ropes. I bet him and Stitch have a really good laugh in the late afternoon after I have gone home about my training skills.

It's so good to be new at these things, so fun to learn, so fun to watch this old horse run and jump. So fun to watch him lick his bowl, brush him down and comb his tail and mane. Combing his mane and tail is my favorite thing...probably not his favorite but it's mine. Remember, if you can, when you played dolls and you would comb their hair and do it all fancy, or when you pretended you had long hair (which I never had. But we used to pretend by putting towels on our heads and pretending it was long hair. Yep, I did that.). I love combing Granites mane and tail; it takes me back to when I was a kid. I comb it all pretty and take pictures of him.
He gets impatient by the time I get to his tail, so his tail never looks as perfect as his mane. Silly how such a simple task can bring such a wealth of happiness and fond memories. By the time I have played and groomed and fed my big boy I have to tell you I am hot and a little tired. It's hot at Shiloh and I cannot wait until the summer heat is gone.
Anyway, after all this, Granite and I wander back to his pasture and as soon as we come close Stretch is calling to Granite. Granite calls back and it's so nice to see how much they watch out for each other. Granite always stops right in front of the gate and has a nice long drink and then in we go. I have to ask Stretch to step aside so we can get in and then Granite stands very still so that I can take of his halter. I stand there for a minute, give him a hug and a kiss and he stands there, too. We say goodbye for now. Stitch gives Granite a little nudge and off he goes. I swear I can hear Stitch saying, "No, go this way. No, maybe this way." Granite just keeps walking and Stitch does his little directional nudging until they find the perfect place in the pasture.
I know I have found my perfect place. It's a place I can go to put things in perspective, to embrace life and to enjoy the little things that seem not to be noticed in my everyday life. At Shiloh, I notice the little things and they bring a smile to my face and warmth to my heart. See you next week big boy thanks for the memories.

Old Friends

It was a very busy August.
I had a couple of mini vacations, like a 40 year class reunion and a very nice visit with some old friends from my TPM (former employer) days.
But I know you're asking, "What does this have to do with Granite?" A lot. Granite is a new friend. These are old friends. Funny how some times when you have lost touch with old friends and find them all over again, it's like they never left. My 40 year class reunion was like that and the visit with my old TPM friends was like that too.
...Although you have shared memories, meetings like this can be like discovering a friend all over again. My TPM friends and I met for dinner on a Saturday night and I have to say it was one of the most enjoyable evenings I've spent in a long time. Joannie, Sandy, Darin, and myself (my hubby, Ben, came too) laughed and remembered old times and other friends who we hadn't thought of in a while.
This reminds me of a day with Granite. Though he is my new friend, I feel as though we have a past together. I went out to see the old boy Saturday morning and I walked to the pasture as always, searching for him among the other horses. There he was with his friends—always with the same two horses, a buckskin and an old black horse with a white mark on his face. They eat together, swat flies together and just hang together with no real expectations of each other, other than the occasional swat of a tail to get a fly off of another's face—standing head to butt, head to butt.
Granite and his buds are much like me and my old pals sharing a meal...minus the tails and flies, of course.



I think about him a lot because Granite is quite a horse. Though his background is sketchy, I know he is a survivor and must have been quite a ladies man in his day. When Granite's owners abandoned him, they didn't give him up to animal control or bring him to Shiloh. They didn't even drop him off at a horse auction. They just left him alone in his corral with no food and no water. Just left him.
But Granite is a survivor and he wasn't about to give. He got out of the corral. Who knows how long it took him, but he didn't stand there alone and wait to starve or die of thirst;, he changed his destiny. Granite broke free and wandered over to the neighbor's house in search of food, which is how he ended up at Shiloh.
I've had to learn hard lessons like Granite did many times in my life. His friends let him down. The people he trusted to take care of him abandoned him, deserted him when times got tough and did nothing to make sure he would survive. We all know how that feels on some level.
But I'm lucky. I have some really great friends who I know would be there for me in all types of situations. It's important who you pick to be friends with; you can't pick just anyone. Friends come into your life and sometimes they move on, but true friends are always there. And no matter how long it is between visits, nothing changes. Every time you see or speak to them, it's just like you spoke yesterday.

It's like that with Granite and I. August was a long month and I missed seeing him a couple weeks, but when I arrived at Shiloh: there he was, not quite as excited to see me as I was to see him, though. He was a little standoffish, but he warmed up quickly. I guess he had to make sure it was me. We enjoyed a great day together. He ran and played (I love the way he kicks and holds his head high and flicks up his tail as he runs when he's playing). He ate treats and got a nice wash and groom.
I love my guy; he's just the most amazing horse. I feel as though we've been friends for a very long time.
He knows a lot, Granite, and his eyes are gentle and kind. He was a stallion for most of his life and wears some small and one very large scar on his side to prove it. He knows as much about riding as I do, so we can both learn together, and I'm lucky that he's patient.
...Especially when I try to figure out how to put on his halter. It's ridiculous. I've used the darn thing 20 times and I still have to turn in forty different directions to figure out how to put it on. Granite stands there and I swear he would tap his toes if he could. He has learned patience and we have that in common: I've tried to learn to be patient all my life. Funny how I've really started to learn it from a horse. Who'd have thought.

I love getting Granite from his pasture, I get so excited to see him and see how he will react. It's almost silly; I get this little giddy feeling as I approach the gate, search the pasture for him (I swear he hides) looking and looking and still not seeing him, and then there he is standing right in front of me. I go towards him and stop and motion for him to come.
He looks in my direction, turns, licks his lips slowly—oh so slowly—and begins his trek towards me. Sometimes I just can't wait and I go out to meet him in the middle.

Last week at Shiloh I went out to see a dear old friend, Stretch, who holds a very special place in my heart. I love this horse. Originally, when I first started going out to Shiloh, it was Vanilla that caught my eye. I tried and tried for a year to get that horse to trust me and she did a little, but she never really let me in. Stretch was instrumental in my getting to know Vanilla as much as I did. Stretch is Vanilla's companion. They came to Shiloh together and they are always together, inseparable, like one of those old couples you see that have been together for 60 plus years. Stretch is a very tall horse, absolutely huge, and I think he might be a Holstein. I am always in awe when I see him. But sadly, my friend Stretch is getting old and his age is starting to show. I cried a little when I saw him last, but that was quickly replaced with a laugh when he came over to use me as his scratching post. He's another old friend I hadn't seen in a while who made me feel as though we had never been apart. On this day, Jill asked me to move Stretch to another pasture where he would get extra special feed. He is about 27 and he has reached a time in his life were he needs extra care. I was happy to move him to Granite's pasture (Granite is on the move to the big boy pasture). Stretch was nervous so we gave him a nice brush, some worming medicine and we started over to his new digs. It was windy, and as we rounded the corner, he spooked. I think it's been a while since he has been out and about. Its a little intimidating when a 1,600 lb horse starts to freak out, but you know what, I was proud of myself. I handled him and settled him down, all the while nervously looking over my shoulder to see if Jill was coming.
Speaking of friendships, Jill is a new, amazing friend. Jill has been around horses all her life and she knows what she's doing. She immediately took charge of my freaked out steed and marched him to his new pasture with me in tow. Stretch was nervous meeting his new friends, he ran around, up and down the fence. I think he was anxious to get back to his old friends, but for him now this pasture is better. He will make new friends and I hope be feeling a bit better.

My next task was to move Granite. He had watched as I brought in Stretch and he was standoffish and kept his distance. Stretch is a really big horse. Granite is not a little guy, but Stretch is really tall. Granite was moving that day too. He's getting way too fat in his old pasture and needed to go to the big boy pasture. I haltered him up (after turning the halter fifty times to figure out which way it went. What is up with that? It's crafts. I don't do well at crafts) and off Granite and I went on his new journey to meet new friends. In he went with no hesitation, unlike Stretch, who panicked and sort of ran around, Granite purposely meandered to each of the horses and introduced himself. He arched his neck and raised his tail, looking just fine. I watched for awhile and he was accepted by all he choose to meet.
New Friends. Old Friends. All friends are great.
Here's to all friends.
Cheers.